


To Attain Peace in The Shade

by Honeygemtrashbag



Category: Teen Titans (Animated Series)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:15:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25797247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Honeygemtrashbag/pseuds/Honeygemtrashbag
Summary: This is a Raven/Garfield fic about Raven sitting with Gar to talk about his past as a child soldier after there've been small moments of him waking up from nightmares. It’s a needed talk since Garfield has been trying his hardest to continue his ways of levity, not just for his own sake but for Raven who has enough on her plate.
Relationships: Garfield Logan/Raven
Kudos: 7





	To Attain Peace in The Shade

Raven simply put, is not stupid. When not having the crafted hold of her emotions in check to sustain balance with her magic and her health, she is witty, humorous, kind, and quick with the way she carries herself with those who are honored enough to know that part of her. She knows about 6 ways to kill you with spells if she wants to, and about 30 other ways to scare you into never messing with the people she cares about. This is why deep down in his large heart Garfield knew he couldn’t avoid the inevitable conversation of his nightmares acting up. Despite the levity Garfield usually protrudes from his sass, jokes, and movements in the world- there were moments where small remnants of his past could not be shaken away by tofu meals, and video game matches. Part of him knew that his Raven would not let him be alone with any hardships, not just because she loved him, but more than anyone she knew how much the isolation of holding yourself together under any circumstances could swallow you in an instant. They both knew in an equal sense that it was always better to have company even if it is estranged or shifted from the way it previously was. Hence why when they first started dating romantic styles, Garfield immediately asked her if he could sleepover while she meditated, and eventually got her to meditate in his room for fun sometimes. It was not only to have someone as beautiful as Raven in his space, but it also cemented the fact that he was there for her, and that she wasn’t alone in anything she didn’t want to be in anymore. Despite having more wisdom thanks to his love’s influence, the habit of boxing everything that happened with Doom away into a place in his mind to be sorted later when the world wasn’t in danger was an old habit with claws. Since the last nightmare ended up with him waking up with tremors and the feeling of his stomach performing a disco dance break to death, it was only a matter of time until Raven would sit him down- however, it was not until the rest of the team had gone out for a shopping spree they both declined for separate reasons, did Raven appear in his space to talk. In the time he waited for this moment, it had been two days since he assumed she would say something. She walked in gently to his room and grabbed his hand. He looked curiously at her silently, but she just looked at him quietly in return, pulling them through the halls until they reached the big couch and threw him gently on the couch. This was not what he was expecting but seeing his girl take action it was hard to object to whatever was going to happen. He would overtime admit that it was an act of love that made his heart sing when Raven did not budge on caring for him loudly. Not that he wasn’t grateful for having her love in the first place- that is an act of miracles to a creator most merciful but when Raven outrights shows how much she adores him in moments beside a sweltering intimacy shared in their bedrooms it assures him that the world is okay for a moment. He was pulled out of his head when he heard the familiar jet engine hum of a console being turned on and watching quietly as Raven booted everything up and flicked through the options until his favorite racing game was open and running. When she handed him the remote and plugged in hers he spoke softly, just to make sure that he wasn’t having a moment:

“Rae, whatcha doin?”  
Raven gave him a Look(TM) that held nothing but love as she replied:  
“Making popcorn, do you want anything on your share?  
Garfield for the umpteenth time in a row had fallen in love with Raven. How could he not? Raven, his Raven smoothly making a place for him to exist with her and her feeling safe enough to do so- the teenager that pined after her would have died and been reborn in an instance. Despite this revelation, he spoke again, but with a quiet joke:

“Oh no, you can leave it plain, Jane”  
To his surprise, Raven smiled and replied:  
“I thought I was Raven”  
Garfield found himself laughing at that, despite him giving her a look of shock for her dad joke:  
“You did not just overtake my goof!”  
Raven’s laugh sounded like a series of bells in a melody before she said in a deadpan voice:  
“You are to blame for that, Garfield you seem to be rubbing off on me in more ways than one”  
Garfield found himself giving Raven a look, the innuendo making him grin widely, instead of retorting something smart, he gently pulled her into a kiss, humming happily into it as she pushed back with earnestness. When they pulled away to breathe, Raven pressed her forehead against his and spoke gently:  
“Is it okay if we can talk about what’s been going on now?” 

Garfield had begun to purr softly from Raven’s scent being in his space accompanied by her warmth, he did nod at the question, staying close to her for a moment before pulling away.  
He took another moment to pause before speaking in a voice that sounded akin to his behavior in missions: focused to a point of tunnel vision, and serious:

“The nightmares only happened twice this time, but they weren’t just my regular ones of me being with doom, and seeing people suffer from what I had helped bring to life either.. I know I don’t talk about my days with the Patrol a lot with you, and it’s not because I don’t trust you. I trust you so much babe, I just don’t know how to go about it in a way that doesn’t hurt me or even you because I know you care and I love you for it.” Garfield paused needing another moment of air. He felt a gentle hand rubbing the middle of his back, a habit shared by Raven and himself when they confided in each other, he gently gave her a look of love knowing she could sense his turmoil and understand that it really was just him trying to figure out how to keep the peace he’s earned.  
“The one where I bolted awake was the worst one if I'm being honest, I was young in this one, and I saw you, as you are now about to die in front of me and I couldn’t move from the hands of everyone I took out holding me back from trying to save you. I woke up afraid that I had lost you. You’re honestly the best person I’ve loved, and I am so afraid to lose you, even the kid in me wants to fight for you, and he was a huge dickweed.” 

When he finally finished his admission he looked up to see Raven looking back with a look of understanding, and of love. She silently pulled him into her arms and held him into a hug. He held onto her tightly, gently nuzzling her neck out of habit, letting the silence take over them both. It was almost akin to silence of reverence, where the moment of their embrace could be considered a moment of thanking whatever needed to be thanked for allowing them to be alive, and well enough to lean on one another. He felt her move so she could speak gently while still hugging him tightly, her words heavily within the emotions of love, pain, and even determination:  
"Garfield, I love you so much. I'm afraid of losing you too, but we're strong, and we're not alone anymore. We have each other, and we also have our family here- and they love us more than anything. I don't know everything about you- but I do know how deep the well is when it comes to your feelings on it. I know you know I watch you sleep, and when I would trace your skin for fun, it felt like your skin was the surface for a sea storm of all the emotions your nightmares give you. Please don't feel bad for that, I'm an empath by nature so it's expected. I knew you wanted to talk to me and that assuaged me into making sure this would be on your terms if it needed to be."  
Raven then pulled away for a moment to look him in the eyes:  
"I also know that you don't want to talk all the time because of all the things I do and everything that makes me who I am, and that is stupid of you since I've juggled Robin and Star's spats and still been there for you regardless. My love for you will not fade when you do not feel as strong as you need to be. I will love all parts of you no matter what. You've done the same for me- even when you've seen my father's heritage stare you in the face."  
Garfield gently pulled her into another kiss quietly moved by the way she managed to both reprimand him and continue to love him in a practiced grace. He pulled away to speak gently:  
"I love you too. Thank you for being here with me. Don't tell Cy- but you're my best friend, thank you for being with me even though my brain likes to fight me."  
Raven gently smirked at that, kissing him softly:  
"Well, you've seen the mirror I have so we're both fighting our brains- I just have a better track record on beating yours back into place. You're my best friend too. We're not alone anymore Gar, so it's okay to need- even if it's a night like this where it's an all you event, or we need to be around others. I need you a lot of the time, and I know you like to be needed by me, so please shower me with things that are actually more important to do if you need me. I like to be needed by you too."  
Garfield held back tears as he smiled happily, kissing Raven until they both needed air:  
"Yes ma'am"  
The night ended with them cuddled on the couch, hands locked together, both of them lulled into dreamless rest.  
-end.

**Author's Note:**

> yo what's good, this is my first time writing a fic for this fandom, feel free to follow me on tumblr at honeygemtrashbag  
> feel free to leave any love if you like  
> wishing you good food, good people, and good health,  
> thank you for existing


End file.
